When we are angry, we say and do things to make ourselves feel good. Still, momentary satisfaction is precisely that, a temporary feeling. What are the chances that we will feel good after a temper tantrum, not many? I know I have this urge to just blurt things out whenever I’m angry at my spouse or my kids or my sisters, but blurting anything out for the sole purpose of venting anger or hurt feelings is never the best idea for many reasons.
Any communication that we direct towards another person should have a purpose and an end goal. Even when we are angry and upset, the response should be to get a result, not momentary satisfaction. Also, to win any dispute or argument, a logical response should be delivered calmly. A low-key response might not get the desired outcome, but anger is unhealthy and unproductive. Anger deprives a reaction of its importance and legitimacy if that makes any sense. I have noticed it with kids; whenever I am angry, I do not get the attention I’d like. After a mad rant, my older two kids always tell me that I am not making any sense or just letting out steam. In short, my words do not carry much weight in anger. However, I get much better results when I am angry and think through my response before delivering it. It all boils down to how much we can tolerate, but remember, momentary satisfaction will never get you what you want from a situation.